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About
Jessie. [ˈdʒɛsi]
A food lover. A dreamer struggling with reality. A practitioner of sarcasm. A closet attention seeker/craver.

The official end of my semester 4.

I guess the burial of lecture notes underneath my study desk helped – saying goodbye and that we will not meet ever again assured my heart that I will pass this semester.

Results were released on Monday right before I got really sick and slept for 2 days consecutively. I got 2 friggin A- (& 1 A for Korean, my elective), 1st time in 2 years of studies. I was really really happy, but asked myself not to be cocky or too self-confidence and be sure to work extra hard for the coming semester at the same time.

Bummed that I have to go through the episode for 2 more semesters. It was really hard for me, the final exam. I did not do well for my midterms (and the only person I can blame is me) so I had to push myself real hard so that I wouldn’t embarrass myself further. Yes pride is my weakness (or the opposite) and it can really helps you or kills you. Bear in mind that I am really not a study person – Making it extra hard to memorise all those shits even though they didn’t make much sense to me. I wanted to give up, hide in a corner to sulk and pretend I don’t care but I can’t. I can’t forget the humiliating moment when I found out that I got the lowest mark of a subject midterm paper out of my class. I broke down cuz I couldn’t deal with the pressure anymore, I couldn’t sleep, I was angry at myself and the universe, I cried in my boyfriend’s arm… But I’m glad in the end it’s all worth it. Thanks to my friends and my boyfriend for supporting/motivating me endlessly and also the universe/god for answering my prayers, or law of attraction, don’t care it’s the same to me… I do believe religion exists for a reason no matter you believe in it or not, perhaps we’ll talk about it the other time.

1:40 am

Of fertilised and unfertilised egg.

The* eggs.

My silly boyfriend thought the commercial eggs are hatchable as long as you own a hen. He says it has something to do with the hen’s hormones (what?) until I told him the existence of fertilised and unfertilised eggs. This just made my day.

12:01 am

Summer book challege #2

So. Many. Feelings. ;___;

First of all, whoa so many characters along with back stories in a book! But all lead to the same point in which sometimes life just doesn’t play out like what you have planned or what you have in mind of, but it will turn out just fine eventually. Just like what Pat (senior)’s mom said, “Sometimes what we want to do and what we must do are not the same. The smaller the space between your desire and what is right, the happier you will be.” - Noted, Antonia. Thanks for the tips.

Of all the mini stories, Maria’s got to me the most - She loves this American stranger more than every man she’s ever known, and that’s why she had to let her go, she knew that there’s no future in them. 

"But I think some people wait forever, and only at the end of their lives do they realise that their lives has happened while they were waiting for it to start."

I guess it applies to all of us - We’re too beautiful ruins.

4:02 am

“There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.”

John Green – The Fault in Our Stars

Just finished reading this book. Didn’t like it nor hate it. It was funny at the beginning and lots of tears in the end. Augustus & Hazel talk like script writers instead of teenagers. The book was enjoyable nonetheless.

1:09 am  1 note

“To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world…”

— Le Petit Prince, 1st ever book that made me cry when I was 11.

5:50 am

“Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. To believe that you must hide all the parts of you that are broken, out of fear that someone else is incapable of loving what is less than perfect, is to believe that sunlight is incapable of entering a broken window and illuminating a dark room.”

— Marc Hack (via seabois)

(via dusty-hearts)

6:00 pm  2,648 notes

5:59 pm  4 notes

A Sunday dream

Had a dream that I was in a public toilet, doing business no. 2 & there was a long queue after me so I decided to put a halt on my business and left. My brother showed up, told me he was looking for me everywhere and told me I should board the plane before the gate closed (at this point I realised I was in an airport the whole time). So I climbed lots of stairs and escalators, not knowing where to go, kept thinking “where the heck is that god damn gate and why the hell am I boarding a plane? Where am I going?!” (It’s a dream, after all) I heard people cheering my friend toward the highest floor downstairs, and I thought well let’s just keep climbing.

And I reached. A jumbo plane to the UK (And the funny thing is, this waiting lounge looked familiar). I kissed my dad and brother goodbye and went forward. Met my friends but they were already lining up and reaching the gate. The queue was too long so I decided to sit and wait.

And I met him. I sat right next to him, he did not recognise me. I whispered a thank you, not recognising him too. And then I woke up.
I should have say hi.

I have never dreamed of him before, this is a first.
Hi my old friend, what are you doing in an airport waiting lounge? How’s the heaven treating you? You did not age at all Danny.
I should have say hi.

2:59 pm

Of blender and smoothies.

So once upon a time I was in a smoothie fever – googling recipe, turning the kitchen into a mess and all… Including buying a “shake ‘n take” blender online at RM55. It arrived last week and I bought some fruits immediately, but then I don’t have the time to actually blend something – I’m at my boyfriend’s place all the time.

Then I realised I can’t delay anymore? Cuz my fruits are turning into shits real fast. And turned out I was right. Some parts of the strawberries were mushy and I didn’t even need a knife to slice the over-ripen kiwis.

The end results were okay, expect that I forgot to add in sugar and ice cubes. And the blender smelled like some burnt motor shit, bloody hell.

1 more box of strawberries and 2 kiwis at home. They’d probably thinking wtf I’m mushy and over-ripe why you no eat me you dumbass! Right now.

9:00 pm

Dumb and dumber shopping for a cooking pot

So my boyfriend and I had lunch at a mall some days ago and I wanted to buy a mini cooking pot that can satisfy my instant noodles crave. We finally saw a stainless steel pot which is in the right size in a store and I was wondering whether does it work on an induction stove as the place I’m currently renting only have 2 little induction cookers (meh but they have their advantages - landlord wouldn’t need to worry about the gas constantly). Last I remembered, my dad once tried to cook instant noodles (it’s a family thing) using a RM5 Daiso aluminium pot and the water couldn’t even warm up. So I googled it with my phone and turned out induction cooker works with anything that has magnetic properties including stainless steel and of course, excluding aluminium. But being an unfaithful person that always has doubt, I told my boyfriend that we should search for a magnet anyway to double confirm, just being careful and all. So both of us were searching high and low throughout the little store for a magnet. And I found one on a door of a steel cabinet (even smaller than a penny). But the magnet was too small comparing with the pot but my boyfriend told me he felt a little attraction (lol). So I bought the pot in the end.

I think the people working there might be thinking, wtf are these 2 monkeys doing?

10:26 am

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